The Supreme Leader
Even the ever so carefully selected and state-approved artist had difficulty presenting Kim in a flattering manner.

Kim Jong-un, “The Great Successor”, Chairman of The Workers Party of North Korea, President, Premier, and Supreme Leader of North Korea, is reported to be in very guarded health, possibly even near death. It’s unclear if that is what prompted the surprise announcement today, by the Democratic National Committee, that the infamous North Korean Dictator was being granted honorary citizenship and registration as a Democrat, in The United States.

Earlier today, I received word from our esteemed comrade and Speaker of The House Nancy Pelosi, who confirmed that secretly embedded into H.R.6201 – Families First Coronavirus Response Act was an amendment naming Kim Jong-un as an honorary US citizen, and registered member of The Democrat party” Tom Perez, Chair of the Democratic National Committee said in a prepared statement. “Supreme Leader JoNg-un has the perfect profile to be a celebrated democrat and immigrant; he’s a foreign national and a climate change refugee, overweight, suffering from hypertension and diabetes–perfect to highlight the necessity of granting the universal human right of free health care for pre-existing conditions. Combined with his fanatical belief in political dictatorship, these attributes make him a welcome addition to the progressive family.

New kid on the block

According to our sources, if his health improves, Jong-un will move to Hollywood to produce movies for Disney, and star in his own reality TV series based on Trump’s “The Apprentice” with his catch phrase to be “You’re Executed” instead of “You’re Fired.”

President Trump seemed surprised by the news when questioned about it during his daily press conference. “Really? No. I had not heard that. Rocket man. A citizen, and Democrat. OK. No worries. Travel ban still in effect.” The President said.

Meanwhile, our confidential DC sources are saying that this has been planned for some time. Jong-un is a good friend of both Chelsea Clinton and Prince Harry; the three share many qualities and interests, including low IQ and lack of charisma, but incredible wealth and power from tyrannical, enabling parents. Besides his new career in Hollywood. Kim is said to be prepared to sit on the Board of Directors for the Clinton Global Initiative Foundation, Jong-un will live in Beverly Hills and is excited by the opportunity to work with Meghan Markle and practice philanthropy in America, after having brought so much joy to his own land.

Spread the Philthiness

By Walter Kurtz

The horror! I got tired of the Deep State continuously sending assassins to kill me. So I faked my own death, during a documentary film. Later I had the film edited to appear as a work of fiction. Since then I've been roaming the globe, killing judiciously, and lavising kindness and affection on the weak and needy. I've now decided to start publishing the truth for my good friend El Capitaz, on the website The Philthy Times. The horror of these philthy times must be documented.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *